Couldn't drive a greasy stick up a dog's arse

insult

Hopeless at driving. Can also mean generally incompetent.

Person 1"Jono backed into the letterbox again."

Person 2"He couldn't drive a greasy stick up a dog's arse."

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While you're here

Face like a chewed Mintie
Crumpled and sour-looking.
He'd root a snake's mouth if someone held it open
He will have sex with anyone or anything.
I hope your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders
A curse on someone you are very angry with.
Not enough brains to give himself a headache
Very stupid.
Useful as tits on a bull
Completely useless.
A stubbie short of a six-pack
Not very bright, or a bit mad.

Random one for ya